白痴 英文版 The Idiot
陀思妥耶夫斯基 Fyodor Dostoyevsky
The Idiot III.
As a general rule, old General Ivolgin's paroxysms ended insmoke. He had before this experienced fits of sudden fury, butnot very often, because he was really a man of peaceful andkindly disposition. He had tried hundreds of times to overcomethe dissolute habits which he had contracted of late years. Hewould suddenly remember that he was "a father," would bereconciled with his wife, and shed genuine tears. His feeling forNina Alexandrovna amounted almost to adoration; she had pardonedso much in silence, and loved him still in spite of the state ofdegradation into which he had fallen. But the general's struggleswith his own weakness never lasted very long. He was, in his way,an impetuous man, and a quiet life of repentance in the bosom ofhis family soon became insupportable to him. In the end herebelled, and flew into rages which he regretted, perhaps, evenas he gave way to them, but which were beyond his control. Hepicked quarrels with everyone, began to hold forth eloquently,exacted unlimited respect, and at last disappeared from thehouse, and sometimes did not return for a long time. He had givenup interfering in the affairs of his family for two years now,and knew nothing about them but what he gathered from hearsay.
But on this occasion there was something more serious than usual.Everyone seemed to know something, but to be afraid to talk aboutit.
The general had turned up in the bosom of his family two or threedays before, but not, as usual, with the olive branch of peace inhis hand, not in the garb of penitence--in which he was usuallyclad on such occasions--but, on the contrary, in an uncommonlybad temper. He had arrived in a quarrelsome mood, pitching intoeveryone he came across, and talking about all sorts and kinds ofsubjects in the most unexpected manner, so that it was impossibleto discover what it was that was really putting him out. Atmoments he would be apparently quite bright and happy; but as arule he would sit moody and thoughtful. He would abruptlycommence to hold forth about the Epanchins, about Lebedeff, orthe prince, and equally abruptly would stop short and refuse tospeak another word, answering all further questions with a stupidsmile, unconscious that he was smiling, or that he had been askeda question. The whole of the previous night he had spent tossingabout and groaning, and poor Nina Alexandrovna had been busymaking cold compresses and warm fomentations and so on, withoutbeing very clear how to apply them. He had fallen asleep after awhile, but not for long, and had awaked in a state of violenthypochondria which had ended in his quarrel with Hippolyte, andthe solemn cursing of Ptitsin's establishment generally. It wasalso observed during those two or three days that he was in astate of morbid self-esteem, and was specially touchy on allpoints of honour. Colia insisted, in discussing the matter withhis mother, that all this was but the outcome of abstinence fromdrink, or perhaps of pining after Lebedeff, with whom up to thistime the general had been upon terms of the greatest friendship;but with whom, for some reason or other, he had quarrelled a fewdays since, parting from him in great wrath. There had also beena scene with the prince. Colia had asked an explanation of thelatter, but had been forced to conclude that he was not told thewhole truth.
If Hippolyte and Nina Alexandrovna had, as Gania suspected, hadsome special conversation about the general's actions, it wasstrange that the malicious youth, whom Gania had called ascandal-monger to his face, had not allowed himself a similarsatisfaction with Colia.
The fact is that probably Hippolyte was not quite so black asGania painted him; and it was hardly likely that he had informedNina Alexandrovna of certain events, of which we know, for themere pleasure of giving her pain. We must never forget that humanmotives are generally far more complicated than we are apt tosuppose, and that we can very rarely accurately describe themotives of another. It is much better for the writer, as a rule,to content himself with the bare statement of events; and weshall take this line with regard to the catastrophe recordedabove, and shall state the remaining events connected with thegeneral's trouble shortly, because we feel that we have alreadygiven to this secondary character in our story more attentionthan we originally intended.
The course of events had marched in the following order. WhenLebedeff returned, in company with the general, after theirexpedition to town a few days since, for the purpose ofinvestigation, he brought the prince no information whatever. Ifthe latter had not himself been occupied with other thoughts andimpressions at the time, he must have observed that Lebedeff notonly was very uncommunicative, but even appeared anxious to avoidhim.
When the prince did give the matter a little attention, herecalled the fact that during these days he had always foundLebedeff to be in radiantly good spirits, when they happened tomeet; and further, that the general and Lebedeff were alwaystogether. The two friends did not seem ever to be parted for amoment.
Occasionally the prince heard loud talking and laughing upstairs,and once he detected the sound of a jolly soldier's song going onabove, and recognized the unmistakable bass of the general'svoice. But the sudden outbreak of song did not last; and for anhour afterwards the animated sound of apparently drunkenconversation continued to be heard from above. At length therewas the clearest evidence of a grand mutual embracing, andsomeone burst into tears. Shortly after this, however, there wasa violent but short-lived quarrel, with loud talking on bothsides.
All these days Colia had been in a state of great mentalpreoccupation. Muishkin was usually out all day, and only camehome late at night. On his return he was invariably informed thatColia had been looking for him. However, when they did meet,Colia never had anything particular to tell him, excepting thathe was highly dissatisfied with the general and his presentcondition of mind and behaviour.
"They drag each other about the place," he said, and get drunktogether at the pub close by here, and quarrel in the streeton the way home, and embrace one another after it, and don't seemto part for a moment."
When the prince pointed out that there was nothing new aboutthat, for that they had always behaved in this manner together,Colia did not know what to say; in fact he could not explain whatit was that specially worried him, just now, about his father.
On the morning following the bacchanalian songs and quarrelsrecorded above, as the prince stepped out of the house at abouteleven o'clock, the general suddenly appeared before him, muchagitated.
"I have long sought the honour and opportunity of meeting you--much-esteemed Lef Nicolaievitch," he murmured, pressing theprince's hand very hard, almost painfully so; "long--very long."
The prince begged him to step in and sit down.
"No--I will not sit down,--I am keeping you, I see,--anothertime!--I think I may be permitted to congratulate you upon therealization of your heart's best wishes, is it not so?"
"What best wishes?"
The prince blushed. He thought, as so many in his position do,that nobody had seen, heard, noticed, or understood anything.
"Oh--be easy, sir, be easy! I shall not wound your tenderestfeelings. I've been through it all myself, and I know well howunpleasant it is when an outsider sticks his nose in where he isnot wanted. I experience this every morning. I came to speak toyou about another matter, though, an important matter. A veryimportant matter, prince."
him, prince, I don't indeed!" cried Lebedeff.
The latter requested him to take a seat once more, and sat downhimself.
"Well--just for one second, then. The fact is, I came for advice.Of course I live now without any very practical objects in life;but, being full of self-respect, in which quality the ordinaryRussian is so deficient as a rule, and of activity, I amdesirous, in a word, prince, of placing myself and my wife andchildren in a position of--in fact, I want advice."
The prince commended his aspirations with warmth.
"Quite so--quite so! But this is all mere nonsense. I came hereto speak of something quite different, something very important,prince. And I have determined to come to you as to a man in whosesincerity and nobility of feeling I can trust like--like--are yousurprised at my words, prince?"
The prince was watching his guest, if not with much surprise, atall events with great attention and curiosity.
The old man was very pale; every now and then his lips trembled,and his hands seemed unable to rest quietly, but continuallymoved from place to place. He had twice already jumped up fromhis chair and sat down again without being in the least aware ofit. He would take up a hook from the table and open it--talkingall the while,--look at the heading of a chapter, shut it and putit back again, seizing another immediately, but holding itunopened in his hand, and waving it in the air as he spoke.
"But enough!" he cried, suddenly. "I see I have been boring youwith my--"
"Not in the least--not in the least, I assure you. On thecontrary, I am listening most attentively, and am anxious toguess-"
"Prince, I wish to place myself in a respectable position--I wishto esteem myself--and to--"
The prince brought out his "copy-book sentence" in the firmbelief that it would produce a good effect. He felt instinctivelythat some such well-sounding humbug, brought out at the propermoment, would soothe the old man's feelings, and would bespecially acceptable to such a man in such a position. At allhazards, his guest must be despatched with heart relieved andspirit comforted; that was the problem before the prince at thismoment.
word! Softly, softly!"What .
The phrase flattered the general, touched him, and pleased himmightily. He immediately changed his tone, and started off on along and solemn explanation. But listen as he would, the princecould make neither head nor tail of it.
The general spoke hotly and quickly for ten minutes; he spoke asthough his words could not keep pace with his crowding thoughts.Tears stood in his eyes, and yet his speech was nothing but acollection of disconnected sentences, without beginning andwithout end--a string of unexpected words and unexpectedsentiments--colliding with one another, and jumping over oneanother, as they burst from his lips.
"Enough!" he concluded at last, "you understand me, and that isthe great thing. A heart like yours cannot help understanding thesufferings of another. Prince, you are the ideal of generosity;what are other men beside yourself? But you are young--accept myblessing! My principal object is to beg you to fix an hour for amost important conversation--that is my great hope, prince. Myheart needs but a little friendship and sympathy, and yet Icannot always find means to satisfy it."
"But why not now? I am ready to listen, and--"
"No, no--prince, not now! Now is a dream! And it is too, tooimportant! It is to be the hour of Fate to me--MY OWN hour. Ourinterview is not to be broken in upon by every chance comer,every impertinent guest--and there are plenty of such stupid,impertinent fellows"--(he bent over and whispered mysteriously,with a funny, frightened look on his face)--"who are unworthy totie your shoe, prince. I don't say MINE, mind--you willunderstand me, prince. Only YOU understand me, prince--no oneelse. HE doesn't understand me, he is absolutely--ABSOLUTELYunable to sympathize. The first qualification for understandinganother is Heart."
The prince was rather alarmed at all this, and was obliged to endby appointing the same hour of the following day for theinterview desired. The general left him much comforted and farless agitated than when he had arrived.
At seven in the evening, the prince sent to request Lebedeff topay him a visit. Lebedeff came at once, and "esteemed it anhonour," as he observed, the instant he entered the room. Heacted as though there had never been the slightest suspicion ofthe fact that he had systematically avoided the prince for thelast three days.
He sat down on the edge of his chair, smiling and making faces,and rubbing his hands, and looking as though he were in delightedexpectation of hearing some important communication, which hadbeen long guessed by all.
The prince was instantly covered with confusion; for it appearedto be plain that everyone expected something of him--thateveryone looked at him as though anxious to congratulate him, andgreeted him with hints, and smiles, and knowing looks.
Keller, for instance, had run into the house three times of late,"just for a moment," and each time with the air of desiring tooffer his congratulations. Colia, too, in spite of hismelancholy, had once or twice begun sentences in much the samestrain of suggestion or insinuation.
The prince, however, immediately began, with some show ofannoyance, to question Lebedeff categorically, as to thegeneral's present condition, and his opinion thereon. Hedescribed the morning's interview in a few words.
"Everyone has his worries, prince, especially in these strangeand troublous times of ours," Lebedeff replied, drily, and withthe air of a man disappointed of his reasonable expectations.
"Dear me, what a philosopher you are!" laughed the prince.
Philosophy is necessary, sir--very necessary--in our day. It istoo much neglected. As for me, much esteemed prince, I amsensible of having experienced the honour of your confidence in acertain matter up to a certain point, but never beyond thatpoint. I do not for a moment complain--"
"Not the least bit in the world, esteemed and revered prince! Notthe least bit in the world!" cried Lebedeff, solemnly, with hishand upon his heart. "On the contrary, I am too painfully awarethat neither by my position in the world, nor by my gifts ofintellect and heart, nor by my riches, nor by any former conductof mine, have I in any way deserved your confidence, which is farabove my highest aspirations and hopes. Oh no, prince; I mayserve you, but only as your humble slave! I am not angry, oh no!Not angry; pained perhaps, but nothing more.
"My dear Lebedeff, I--"
"Oh, nothing more, nothing more! I was saying to myself but now...'I am quite unworthy of friendly relations with him,' say I;'but perhaps as landlord of this house I may, at some future date,in his good time, receive information as to certain imminent andmuch to be desired changes--'"
So saying Lebedeff fixed the prince with his sharp little eyes,still in hope that he would get his curiosity satisfied.
lining of my coat was--quite accidentally,
The prince looked back at him in amazement.
"I don't understand what you are driving at!" he cried, almostangrily, "and, and--what an intriguer you are, Lebedeff!" headded, bursting into a fit of genuine laughter.
Lebedeff followed suit at once, and it was clear from his radiantface that he considered his prospects of satisfaction immenselyimproved.
"And do you know," the prince continued, "I am amazed at yournaive ways, Lebedeff! Don't he angry with me--not only yours,everybody else's also! You are waiting to hear something from meat this very moment with such simplicity that I declare I feelquite ashamed of myself for having nothing whatever to tell you.I swear to you solemnly, that there is nothing to tell. There!Can you take that in?" The prince laughed again.
Lebedeff assumed an air of dignity. It was true enough that hewas sometimes naive to a degree in his curiosity; but he was alsoan excessively cunning gentleman, and the prince was almostconverting him into an enemy by his repeated rebuffs. The princedid not snub Lebedeff's curiosity, however, because he felt anycontempt for him; but simply because the subject was too delicateto talk about. Only a few days before he had looked upon his owndreams almost as crimes. But Lebedeff considered the refusal ascaused by personal dislike to himself, and was hurt accordingly.Indeed, there was at this moment a piece of news, mostinteresting to the prince, which Lebedeff knew and even hadwished to tell him, but which he now kept obstinately to himself.
"And what can I do for you, esteemed prince? Since I am told yousent for me just now," he said, after a few moments' silence.
"Oh, it was about the general," began the prince, waking abruptlyfrom the fit of musing which he too had indulged in "and-andabout the theft you told me of."
"That is--er--about--what theft?"
"Oh come! just as if you didn't understand, Lukian Timofeyovitch!What are you up to? I can't make you out! The money, the money,sir! The four hundred roubles that you lost that day. You cameand told me about it one morning, and then went off toPetersburg. There, NOW do you understand?"
told me," said the prince,thoughtfully.
"Oh--h--h! You mean the four hundred roubles!" said Lebedeff,dragging the words out, just as though it had only just dawnedupon him what the prince was talking about. "Thanks very much,prince, for your kind interest--you do me too much honour. Ifound the money, long ago!"
"You found it? Thank God for that!"
purse and counted it myself; right to a !
"Your exclamation proves the generous sympathy of your nature,prince; for four hundred roubles--to a struggling family man likemyself--is no small matter!"
"I didn't mean that; at least, of course, I'm glad for your sake,too," added the prince, correcting himself, " but--how did youfind it?"
"Very simply indeed! I found it under the chair upon which mycoat had hung; so that it is clear the purse simply fell out ofthe pocket and on to the floor!"
"Under the chair? Impossible! Why, you told me yourself that youhad searched every corner of the room? How could you not havelooked in the most likely place of all?"
"Of course I looked there,--of course I did! Very much so! Ilooked and scrambled about, and felt for it, and wouldn't believeit was not there, and looked again and again. It is always so insuch cases. One longs and expects to find a lost article; onesees it is not there, and the place is as hare as one's palm; andyet one returns and looks again and again, fifteen or twentytimes, likely enough!"
"Oh, quite so, of course. But how was it in your case?--I don'tquite understand," said the bewildered prince. "You say it wasn'tthere at first, and that you searched the place thoroughly, andyet it turned up on that very spot!"
"Yes, sir--on that very spot." The prince gazed strangely atLebedeff. "And the general?" he asked, abruptly.
"The--the general? How do you mean, the general?" said Lebedeff,dubiously, as though he had not taken in the drift of theprince's remark.
"Oh, good heavens! I mean, what did the general say when thepurse turned up under the chair? You and he had searched for ittogether there, hadn't you?"
"Quite so--together! But the second time I thought better to saynothing about finding it. I found it alone."
"But--why in the world--and the money? Was it all there?"
"I opened the purse and counted it myself; right to a singlerouble."
"I think you might have come and told me," said the prince,thoughtfully.
"Oh--I didn't like to disturb you, prince, in the midst of yourprivate and doubtless most interesting personal reflections.Besides, I wanted to appear, myself, to have found nothing. Itook the purse, and opened it, and counted the money, and shut itand put it down again under the chair."
"What in the world for?"
"Oh, just out of curiosity," said Lebedeff, rubbing his hands andsniggering.
"What, it's still there then, is it? Ever since the day beforeyesterday?"
"Oh no! You see, I was half in hopes the general might find it.Because if I found it, why should not he too observe an objectlying before his very eyes? I moved the chair several times so asto expose the purse to view, but the general never saw it. He isvery absent just now, evidently. He talks and laughs and tellsstories, and suddenly flies into a rage with me, goodness knowswhy."
"Well, but--have you taken the purse away now?"
"No, it disappeared from under the chair in the night."
"Where is it now, then?"
"Here," laughed Lebedeff, at last, rising to his full height andlooking pleasantly at the prince, "here, in the lining of mycoat. Look, you can feel it for yourself, if you like!"
Sure enough there was something sticking out of the front of thecoat--something large. It certainly felt as though it might wellbe the purse fallen through a hole in the pocket into the lining.
"I took it out and had a look at it; it's all right. I've let itslip back into the lining now, as you see, and so I have beenwalking about ever since yesterday morning; it knocks against mylegs when I walk along."
"H'm! and you take no notice of it?"
"Quite so, I take no notice of it. Ha, ha! and think of this,prince, my pockets are always strong and whole, and yet, here inone night, is a huge hole. I know the phenomenon is unworthy ofyour notice; but such is the case. I examined the hole, and Ideclare it actually looks as though it had been made with a pen-knife, a most improbable contingency."
"And--and--the general?"
"Ah, very angry all day, sir; all yesterday and all today. Heshows decided bacchanalian predilections at one time, and atanother is tearful and sensitive, but at any moment he is liableto paroxysms of such rage that I assure you, prince, I am quitealarmed. I am not a military man, you know. Yesterday we weresitting together in the tavern, and the lining of my coat was--quite accidentally, of course--sticking out right in front. Thegeneral squinted at it, and flew into a rage. He never looks mequite in the face now, unless he is very drunk or maudlin; butyesterday he looked at me in such a way that a shiver went alldown my back. I intend to find the purse tomorrow; but till thenI am going to have another night of it with him."
"What's the good of tormenting him like this?" cried the prince.
"I don't torment him, prince, I don't indeed!" cried Lebedeff,hotly. "I love him, my dear sir, I esteem him; and believe it ornot, I love him all the better for this business, yes--and valuehim more."
Lebedeff said this so seriously that the prince quite lost histemper with him.
"Nonsense! love him and torment him so! Why, by the very factthat he put the purse prominently before you, first under thechair and then in your lining, he shows that he does not wish todeceive you, but is anxious to beg your forgiveness in thisartless way. Do you hear? He is asking your pardon. He confidesin the delicacy of your feelings, and in your friendship for him.And you can allow yourself to humiliate so thoroughly honest aman!"
"Thoroughly honest, quite so, prince, thoroughly honest!" saidLebedeff, with flashing eyes. "And only you, prince, could havefound so very appropriate an expression. I honour you for it,prince. Very well, that's settled; I shall find the purse now andnot tomorrow. Here, I find it and take it out before your eyes!And the money is all right. Take it, prince, and keep it tilltomorrow, will you? Tomorrow or next day I'll take it back again.I think, prince, that the night after its disappearance it wasburied under a bush in the garden. So I believe--what do youthink of that?"
"Well, take care you don't tell him to his face that you havefound the purse. Simply let him see that it is no longer in thelining of your coat, and form his own conclusions."
"Do you think so? Had I not just better tell him I have found it,and pretend I never guessed where it was?"
"No, I don't think so," said the prince, thoughtfully; "it's toolate for that--that would be dangerous now. No, no! Better saynothing about it. Be nice with him, you know, but don't show him--oh, YOU know well enough--"
"I know, prince, of course I know, but I'm afraid I shall notcarry it out; for to do so one needs a heart like your own. He isso very irritable just now, and so proud. At one moment he willembrace me, and the next he flies out at me and sneers at me, andthen I stick the lining forward on purpose. Well, au revoir,prince, I see I am keeping you, and boring you, too, interferingwith your most interesting private reflections."
"Now, do be careful! Secrecy, as before!"
"Oh, silence isn't the word! Softly, softly!"
But in spite of this conclusion to the episode, the princeremained as puzzled as ever, if not more so. He awaited nextmorning's interview with the general most impatiently.