旧式女孩 英文版 An Old-fashioned Girl
露意莎.梅.奥尔科特 Louisa May Alcott
CHAPTER IX LESSONS Page 2
Polly took the bit of paper Miss Mills gave her, and read thesewords:
DEAR MRS. FINN, Please forgive me for the trouble I make you,but I don't see any other way. I can't get work that pays enough tokeep me; the Dr. says I can't be well unless I rest. I hate to be aburden, so I 'm going away not to trouble anybody anymore. I 'vesold my things to pay what I owe you. Please let me be as I am,and don't let people come and look at me. I hope it is n't verywicked, but there don't seem any room for me in the world, and I'm not afraid to die now, though I should be if I stayed and got badbecause I had n't strength to keep right. Give my love to the baby,and so good-by, good-by.
JANE BRYANT.
"O, Miss Mills, how dreadful!" cried Polly, with her eyes so fullshe could hardly read the little letter.
"Not so dreadful as it might have been, but a bitter, sad thing to seethat child, only seventeen, lying there in her little clean, oldnight-gown, waiting for death to come and take her, because 'theredid n't seem to be any room for her in the world.' Ah, well, wesaved her, for it was n't too late, thank heaven, and the first thingshe said was, 'Oh, why did you bring me back?' I 've been nursingher all day, hearing her story, and trying to show her that there isroom and a welcome for her. Her mother died a year ago, andsince then she has been struggling along alone. She is one of thetimid, innocent, humble creatures who can't push their way, and soget put aside and forgotten. She has tried all sorts of poorly paidwork, could n't live on it decently, got discouraged, sick,frightened, and could see no refuge from the big, bad world but toget out of it while she was n't afraid to die. A very old story, mydear, new and dreadful as it seems to you, and I think it won't doyou any harm to see and help this little girl, who has gone throughdark places that you are never like to know."
"I will; indeed, I will do all I can! Where is she now?" asked Polly,touched to the heart by the story, so simple yet so sad.
"There," and Miss Mills pointed to the door of her own littlebedroom. "She was well enough to be moved to-night, so I broughther home and laid her safely in my bed. Poor little soul! she lookedabout her for a minute, then the lost look went away, and she gavea great sigh, and took my hand in both her thin bits of ones, andsaid, 'O, ma'am, I feel as if I 'd been born into a new world. Helpme to begin again, and I 'll do better.' So I told her she was mychild now, and might rest here, sure of a home as long as I hadone."
As Miss Mills spoke in her motherly tone, and cast a proud andhappy look toward the warm and quiet nest in which she hadsheltered this friendless little sparrow, feeling sure that God meanther to keep it from falling to the ground, Polly put both arms abouther neck, and kissed her withered cheek with as much lovingreverence as if she had been a splendid saint, for in the likeness ofthis plain old maid she saw the lovely charity that blesses andsaves the world.
"How good you are! Dear Miss Mills, tell me what to do, let mehelp you, I 'm ready for anything," said Polly, very humbly, for herown troubles looked so small and foolish beside the sternhardships which had nearly had so tragical an end, that she feltheartily ashamed of herself, and quite burned to atone for them.
Miss, Mills stopped to stroke the fresh cheek opposite, to smile,and say, "Then, Polly, I think I 'll ask you to go in and say afriendly word to my little girl. The sight of you will do her good;and you have just the right way of comforting people, withoutmaking a fuss."
"Have I?" said Polly, looking much gratified by the words.
"Yes, dear, you 've the gift of sympathy, and the rare art ofshowing it without offending. I would n't let many girls in to seemy poor Jenny, because they 'd only flutter and worry her; but you'll know what to do; so go, and take this wrapper with you; it 'sdone now, thanks to your nimble fingers."
Polly threw the warm garment over her arm, feeling a thrill ofgratitude that it was to wrap a living girl in, and not to hide away ayoung heart that had grown cold too soon. Pushing open the door,she went quietly into the dimly lighted room, and on the pillowsaw a face that drew her to it with an irresistible power, for it wastouched by a solemn shadow that made its youth pathetic. As shepaused at the bedside, thinking the girl asleep, a pair of hollow,dark eyes opened wide, and looked up at her; startled at first, thensoftening with pleasure, at sight of the bonny face before them,and then a humble, beseeching expression filled them, as if askingpardon for the rash act nearly committed, and pity for the hard fatethat prompted it. Polly read the language of these eyes, andanswered their mute prayer with a simple eloquence that said morethan any words for she just stooped down and kissed the poorchild, with her own eyes full, and lips that trembled with thesympathy she could not tell. Jenny put both arms about her neck,and began to shed the quiet tears that so refresh and comfort heavyhearts when a tender touch unseals the fountain where they lie.
"Everybody is so kind," she sobbed," and I was so wicked, I don'tdeserve it."
"Oh, yes, you do; don't think of that, but rest and let us pet you.The old life was too hard for such a little thing as you, and we aregoing to try and make the new one ever so much easier andhappier," said Polly, forgetting everything except that this was agirl like herself, who needed heartening up.
"Do you live here?" asked Jenny, when her tears were wiped away,still clinging to the new-found friend.
"Yes, Miss Mills lets me have a little room up stairs, and there Ihave my cat and bird, my piano and my posy pots, and live like aqueen. You must come up and see me to-morrow if you are able. I'm often lonely, for there are no young people in the house to playwith me," answered Polly, smiling hospitably.
"Do you sew?" asked Jenny.
"No, I 'm a music teacher, and trot round giving lessons all day."
"How beautiful it sounds, and how happy you must be, so strongand pretty, and able to go round making music all the time," sighedJenny, looking with respectful admiration at the plump, firm handheld in both her thin and feeble ones.
It did sound pleasant even to Polly's ears, and she felt suddenly sorich, and so contented, that she seemed a different creature fromthe silly girl who cried because she could n't go to the party. Itpassed through her mind like a flash, the contrast between her life,and that of the wan creature lying before her, and she felt as if shecould not give enough out of her abundance to this needy littlesister, who had nothing in the wide world but the life just saved toher. That minute did more for Polly than many sermons, or thewisest books, for it brought her face to face with bitter truths,showed her the dark side of life, and seemed to blow away herlittle vanities, her frivolous desires, like a wintry wind, that left awholesome atmosphere behind. Sitting on the bedside, Pollylistened while Jane told the story, which was so new to herlistener, that every word sank deep into her heart, and never wasforgotten.
"Now you must go to sleep. Don't cry nor think, nor do anythingbut rest. That will please Miss Mills best. I 'll leave the doors open,and play you a lullaby that you can't resist. Good night, dear." Andwith another kiss, Polly went away to sit in the darkness of herown room, playing her softest airs till the tired eyes below wereshut, and little Jane seemed to float away on a sea of pleasantsounds, into the happier life which had just dawned for her.
Polly had fully intended to be very miserable, and cry herself tosleep; but when she lay down at last, her pillow seemed very soft,her little room very lovely, with the fire-light flickering on all thehome-like objects, and her new-blown roses breathing her a sweetgood-night. She no longer felt an injured, hard-working, unhappyPolly, but as if quite burdened with blessings, for which she was n'thalf grateful enough. She had heard of poverty and suffering, in thevague, far-off way, which is all that many girls, safe in happyhomes, ever know of it; but now she had seen it, in a shape whichshe could feel and understand, and life grew more earnest to herfrom that minute. So much to do in the great, busy world, and shehad done so little. Where should she begin? Then, like an answercame little Jenny's words, now taking a,'new significance' to Polly'smind, "To be strong, and beautiful, and go round making music allthe time." Yes, she could do that; and with a very earnest prayer,Polly asked for the strength of an upright soul, the beauty of atender heart, the power to make her life a sweet and stirring song,helpful while it lasted, remembered when it died.
Little Jane's last thought had been to wish with all her might, that"God would bless the dear, kind girl up there, and give her all sheasked." I think both prayers, although too humble to be put inwords, went up together, for in the fulness of time they werebeautifully answered.