简.爱 英文版 Jane Eyre
夏洛蒂.勃朗特 Charlotte Bronte
CHAPTER XXIV Page 1
As I rose and dressed, I thought over what had happened, and wonderedif it were a dream. I could not be certain of the reality till Ihad seen Mr. Rochester again, and heard him renew his words of loveand promise.
, Mr. Rochester. I am afraidyour principles.
While arranging my hair, I looked at my face in the glass, and feltit was no longer plain: there was hope in its aspect and life inits colour; and my eyes seemed as if they had beheld the fount offruition, and borrowed beams from the lustrous ripple. I had oftenbeen unwilling to look at my master, because I feared he could notbe pleased at my look; but I was sure I might lift my face to hisnow, and not cool his affection by its expression. I took a plainbut clean and light summer dress from my drawer and put it on: itseemed no attire had ever so well become me, because none had Iever worn in so blissful a mood.
I was not surprised, when I ran down into the hall, to see that abrilliant June morning had succeeded to the tempest of the night;and to feel, through the open glass door, the breathing of a freshand fragrant breeze. Nature must be gladsome when I was so happy.A beggar-woman and her little boy -- pale, ragged objects both --were coming up the walk, and I ran down and gave them all the moneyI happened to have in my purse -- some three or four shillings:good or bad, they must partake of my jubilee. The rooks cawed,and blither birds sang; but nothing was so merry or so musical asmy own rejoicing heart.
Mrs. Fairfax surprised me by looking out of the window with asad countenance, and saying gravely -- "Miss Eyre, will you cometo breakfast?" During the meal she was quiet and cool: but Icould not undeceive her then. I must wait for my master to giveexplanations; and so must she. I ate what I could, and then Ihastened upstairs. I met Adele leaving the schoolroom.
"Where are you going? It is time for lessons. "
"Mr. Rochester has sent me away to the nursery. "
"Where is he?"
"In there, " pointing to the apartment she had left; and I went in,and there he stood.
"Come and bid me good-morning, " said he. I gladly advanced; and itwas not merely a cold word now, or even a shake of the hand that Ireceived, but an embrace and a kiss. It seemed natural: it seemedgenial to be so well loved, so caressed by him.
"Jane, you look blooming, and smiling, and pretty, " said he:"truly pretty this morning. Is this my pale, little elf? Is thismy mustard-seed? This little sunny-faced girl with the dimpledcheek and rosy lips; the satin-smooth hazel hair, and the radianthazel eyes?" (I had green eyes, reader; but you must excuse themistake: for him they were new-dyed, I suppose. )
"It is Jane Eyre, sir. "
"Soon to be Jane Rochester, " he added: "in four weeks, Janet; nota day more. Do you hear that?"
hear that?"intentionsto Mrs. Fairfax, sir: she saw.
I did, and I could not quite comprehend it: it made me giddy. Thefeeling, the announcement sent through me, was something strongerthan was consistent with joy -- something that smote and stunned.It was, I think almost fear.
"You blushed, and now you are white, Jane: what is that for?"
"Because you gave me a new name -- Jane Rochester; and it seems sostrange. "
"Yes, Mrs. Rochester, " said he; "young Mrs. Rochester -- FairfaxRochester's girl-bride. "
other things,and in another?
"It can never be, sir; it does not sound likely. Human beingsnever enjoy complete happiness in this world. I was not born fora different destiny to the rest of my species: to imagine such alot befalling me is a fairy tale -- a day-dream. "
"Which I can and will realise. I shall begin to-day. This morningI wrote to my banker in London to send me certain jewels he has inhis keeping, -- heirlooms for the ladies of Thornfield. In a dayor two I hope to pour them into your lap: for every privilege, everyattention shall be yours that I would accord a peer's daughter, ifabout to marry her. "
"Oh, sir! -- never rain jewels! I don't like to hear them spokenof. Jewels for Jane Eyre sounds unnatural and strange: I wouldrather not have them. "
"No, no, sir! think of other subjects, and speak of other things,and in another strain. Don't address me as if I were a beauty; Iam your plain, Quakerish governess. "
"You are a beauty in my eyes, and a beauty just after the desireof my heart, -- delicate and aerial. "
"Puny and insignificant, you mean. You are dreaming, sir, -- oryou are sneering. For God's sake don't be ironical!"
"I will make the world acknowledge you a beauty, too, " he went on,while I really became uneasy at the strain he had adopted, becauseI felt he was either deluding himself or trying to delude me. "Iwill attire my Jane in satin and lace, and she shall have roses inher hair; and I will cover the head I love best with a pricelessveil. "
"And then you won't know me, sir; and I shall not be your JaneEyre any longer, but an ape in a harlequin's jacket -- a jay inborrowed plumes. I would as soon see you, Mr. Rochester, trickedout in stage-trappings, as myself clad in a court-lady's robe; andI don't call you handsome, sir, though I love you most dearly: fartoo dearly to flatter you. Don't flatter me. "
He pursued his theme, however, without noticing my deprecation."This very day I shall take you in the carriage to Millcote, andyou must choose some dresses for yourself. I told you we shall bemarried in four weeks. The wedding is to take place quietly, inthe church down below yonder; and then I shall waft you away atonce to town. After a brief stay there, I shall bear my treasureto regions nearer the sun: to French vineyards and Italian plains;and she shall see whatever is famous in old story and in modernrecord: she shall taste, too, of the life of cities; and she shalllearn to value herself by just comparison with others. "
"Shall I travel? -- and with you, sir?"
"You shall sojourn at Paris, Rome, and Naples: at Florence,Venice, and Vienna: all the ground I have wandered over shall bere-trodden by you: wherever I stamped my hoof, your sylph's footshall step also. Ten years since, I flew through Europe half mad;with disgust, hate, and rage as my companions: now I shall revisitit healed and cleansed, with a very angel as my comforter. "
I laughed at him as he said this. "I am not an angel, " I asserted;"and I will not be one till I die: I will be myself. Mr. Rochester,you must neither expect nor exact anything celestial of me -- foryou will not get it, any more than I shall get it of you: whichI do not at all anticipate. "
"What do you anticipate of me?"
"For a little while you will perhaps be as you are now, -- a verylittle while; and then you will turn cool; and then you will becapricious; and then you will be stern, and I shall have much adoto please you: but when you get well used to me, you will perhapslike me again, -- LIKE me, I say, not LOVE me. I suppose your lovewill effervesce in six months, or less. I have observed in bookswritten by men, that period assigned as the farthest to which ahusband's ardour extends. Yet, after all, as a friend and companion,I hope never to become quite distasteful to my dear master. "
"Distasteful! and like you again! I think I shall like you again,and yet again: and I will make you confess I do not only LIKE,but LOVE you -- with truth, fervour, constancy. "
"Yet are you not capricious, sir?"
"To women who please me only by their faces, I am the very devilwhen I find out they have neither souls nor hearts -- when theyopen to me a perspective of flatness, triviality, and perhapsimbecility, coarseness, and ill-temper: but to the clear eye andeloquent tongue, to the soul made of fire, and the character thatbends but does not break -- at once supple and stable, tractableand consistent -- I am ever tender and true. "
"Had you ever experience of such a character, sir? Did you everlove such an one?"
"I love it now. "
"But before me: if I, indeed, in any respect come up to yourdifficult standard?"
"I never met your likeness. Jane, you please me, and you master me-- you seem to submit, and I like the sense of pliancy you impart;and while I am twining the soft, silken skein round my finger, itsends a thrill up my arm to my heart. I am influenced -- conquered;and the influence is sweeter than I can express; and the conquestI undergo has a witchery beyond any triumph I can win. Why do yousmile, Jane? What does that inexplicable, that uncanny turn ofcountenance mean?"
"I was thinking, sir (you will excuse the idea; it was involuntary),I was thinking of Hercules and Samson with their charmers -- "
"You were, you little elfish -- "
"Hush, sir! You don't talk very wisely just now; any more thanthose gentlemen acted very wisely. However, had they been married,they would no doubt by their severity as husbands have made up fortheir softness as suitors; and so will you, I fear. I wonder howyou will answer me a year hence, should I ask a favour it does notsuit your convenience or pleasure to grant. "
"Ask me something now, Jane, -- the least thing: I desireto be entreated -- "
"Indeed I will, sir; I have my petition all ready. "
"Speak! But if you look up and smile with that countenance, I shallswear concession before I know to what, and that will make a foolof me. "
"Not at all, sir; I ask only this: don't send for the jewels, anddon't crown me with roses: you might as well put a border of goldlace round that plain pocket handkerchief you have there. "
"I might as well 'gild refined gold. ' I know it: your request isgranted then -- for the time. I will remand the order I despatchedto my banker. But you have not yet asked for anything; you haveprayed a gift to be withdrawn: try again. "
"Well then, sir, have the goodness to gratify my curiosity, whichis much piqued on one point. "
He looked disturbed. "What? what?" he said hastily. "Curiosityis a dangerous petition: it is well I have not taken avow to accord every request -- "
"But there can be no danger in complying with this, sir. "
"Utter it, Jane: but I wish that instead of a mere inquiry into,perhaps, a secret, it was a wish for half my estate. "
"Now, King Ahasuerus! What do I want with half your estate? Doyou think I am a Jew-usurer, seeking good investment in land? Iwould much rather have all your confidence. You will not excludeme from your confidence if you admit me to your heart?"
"You are welcome to all my confidence that is worth having, Jane;but for God's sake, don't desire a useless burden! Don't long forpoison -- don't turn out a downright Eve on my hands!"
"Why not, sir? You have just been telling me how much you likedto be conquered, and how pleasant over-persuasion is to you. Don'tyou think I had better take advantage of the confession, and beginand coax and entreat -- even cry and be sulky if necessary -- forthe sake of a mere essay of my power?"
"I dare you to any such experiment. Encroach, presume, and thegame is up. "
"Is it, sir? You soon give in. How stern you look now! Youreyebrows have become as thick as my finger, and your foreheadresembles what, in some very astonishing poetry, I once saw styled,'a blue-piled thunderloft. ' That will be your married look, sir,I suppose?"
"If that will be YOUR married look, I, as a Christian, will soongive up the notion of consorting with a mere sprite or salamander.But what had you to ask, thing, -- out with it?"
"There, you are less than civil now; and I like rudeness a greatdeal better than flattery. I had rather be a THING than an angel.This is what I have to ask, -- Why did you take such pains to makeme believe you wished to marry Miss Ingram?"
"Is that all? Thank God it is no worse!" And now he unknit hisblack brows; looked down, smiling at me, and stroked my hair, as ifwell pleased at seeing a danger averted. "I think I may confess, "he continued, "even although I should make you a little indignant,Jane -- and I have seen what a fire-spirit you can be when you areindignant. You glowed in the cool moonlight last night, when youmutinied against fate, and claimed your rank as my equal. Janet,by-the-bye, it was you who made me the offer. "
"Of course I did. But to the point if you please, sir -- MissIngram?"
"Well, I feigned courtship of Miss Ingram, because I wished torender you as madly in love with me as I was with you; and I knewjealousy would be the best ally I could call in for the furtheranceof that end. "
"Excellent! Now you are small -- not one whit bigger than theend of my little finger. It was a burning shame and a scandalousdisgrace to act in that way. Did you think nothing of Miss Ingram'sfeelings, sir?"
"Her feelings are concentrated in one -- pride; and that needshumbling. Were you jealous, Jane?"
"Never mind, Mr. Rochester: it is in no way interesting to youto know that. Answer me truly once more. Do you think Miss Ingramwill not suffer from your dishonest coquetry? Won't she feelforsaken and deserted?"
"Impossible! -- when I told you how she, on the contrary, desertedme: the idea of my insolvency cooled, or rather extinguished, herflame in a moment. "
"You have a curious, designing mind, Mr. Rochester. I am afraidyour principles on some points are eccentric. "
"My principles were never trained, Jane: they may have grown alittle awry for want of attention. "
"Once again, seriously; may I enjoy the great good that has beenvouchsafed to me, without fearing that any one else is sufferingthe bitter pain I myself felt a while ago?"
"That you may, my good little girl: there is not another being inthe world has the same pure love for me as yourself -- for I laythat pleasant unction to my soul, Jane, a belief in your affection. "
I turned my lips to the hand that lay on my shoulder. I loved himvery much -- more than I could trust myself to say -- more thanwords had power to express.
"Ask something more, " he said presently; "it is my delight to beentreated, and to yield. "
I was again ready with my request. "Communicate your intentionsto Mrs. Fairfax, sir: she saw me with you last night in the hall,and she was shocked. Give her some explanation before I see heragain. It pains me to be misjudged by so good a woman. "
"Go to your room, and put on your bonnet, " he replied. "I meanyou to accompany me to Millcote this morning; and while you preparefor the drive, I will enlighten the old lady's understanding. Didshe think, Janet, you had given the world for love, and consideredit well lost?"
"I believe she thought I had forgotten my station, and yours, sir. "
Where is he?"shame and.
"Station! station! -- your station is in my heart, and on thenecks of those who would insult you, now or hereafter. -- Go. "
I was soon dressed; and when I heard Mr. Rochester quit Mrs.Fairfax's parlour, I hurried down to it. The old lady, had beenreading her morning portion of Scripture -- the Lesson for theday; her Bible lay open before her, and her spectacles were uponit. Her occupation, suspended by Mr. Rochester's announcement,seemed now forgotten: her eyes, fixed on the blank wall opposite,expressed the surprise of a quiet mind stirred by unwonted tidings.Seeing me, she roused herself: she made a sort of effort to smile,and framed a few words of congratulation; but the smile expired, andthe sentence was abandoned unfinished. She put up her spectacles,shut the Bible, and pushed her chair back from the table.
"I feel so astonished, " she began, "I hardly know what to say toyou, Miss Eyre. I have surely not been dreaming, have I? SometimesI half fall asleep when I am sitting alone and fancy things thathave never happened. It has seemed to me more than once when Ihave been in a doze, that my dear husband, who died fifteen yearssince, has come in and sat down beside me; and that I have evenheard him call me by my name, Alice, as he used to do. Now, canyou tell me whether it is actually true that Mr. Rochester hasasked you to marry him? Don't laugh at me. But I really thoughthe came in here five minutes ago, and said that in a month youwould be his wife. "
"He has said the same thing to me, " I replied.
"He has! Do you believe him? Have you accepted him?"
"Yes. "
She looked at me bewildered. "I could never have thought it. Heis a proud man: all the Rochesters were proud: and his father,at least, liked money. He, too, has always been called careful.He means to marry you?"
"He tells me so. "
"It passes me!" she continued; "but no doubt, it is true since yousay so. How it will answer, I cannot tell: I really don't know.Equality of position and fortune is often advisable in such cases;and there are twenty years of difference in your ages. He mightalmost be your father. "
"No, indeed, Mrs. Fairfax!" exclaimed I, nettled; "he is nothinglike my father! No one, who saw us together, would suppose it foran instant. Mr. Rochester looks as young, and is as young, as somemen at five-and-twenty. "
I was so hurt by her coldness and scepticism, that the tears roseto my eyes.
"I am sorry to grieve you, " pursued the widow; "but you areso young, and so little acquainted with men, I wished to put youon your guard. It is an old saying that 'all is not gold thatglitters;' and in this case I do fear there will be something foundto be different to what either you or I expect. "
"Why? -- am I a monster?" I said: "is it impossible that Mr.Rochester should have a sincere affection for me?"
"No: you are very well; and much improved of late; and Mr. Rochester,I daresay, is fond of you. I have always noticed that you were asort of pet of his. There are times when, for your sake, I havebeen a little uneasy at his marked preference, and have wishedto put you on your guard: but I did not like to suggest even thepossibility of wrong. I knew such an idea would shock, perhapsoffend you; and you were so discreet, and so thoroughly modest andsensible, I hoped you might be trusted to protect yourself. Lastnight I cannot tell you what I suffered when I sought all overthe house, and could find you nowhere, nor the master either; andthen, at twelve o'clock, saw you come in with him. "
"Well, never mind that now, " I interrupted impatiently; "it isenough that all was right. "
"I hope all will be right in the end, " she said: "but believe me,you cannot be too careful. Try and keep Mr. Rochester at a distance:distrust yourself as well as him. Gentlemen in his station arenot accustomed to marry their governesses. "
I was growing truly irritated: happily, Adele ran in.
"Let me go, -- let me go to Millcote too!" she cried. "Mr. Rochesterwon't: though there is so much room in the new carriage. Beg himto let me go mademoiselle. "
"That I will, Adele;" and I hastened away with her, glad to quitmy gloomy monitress. The carriage was ready: they were bringingit round to the front, and my master was on the pavement, Pilotfollowing him backwards and forwards.